Merry Christmas is coming soon...

 

This Mix is designed by evonhon

Busy Blur Blur's life

This recently getting busy...
Although it is holiday now...
Now is the time to wake up...
No more honeymoon...
No more rest...

This recently also getting poor...
Although holiday mother still give me money...
Actually I also don't know where my money gone...
Keep bad mood...

My pitiless result...

Haixxx...Today is my unlucky day...
why why why???
Please view the story below...

My name is Bing Bing... Study at SMK Cheras Perdana( Of course not cluster school)... Whoever want ask me to go out for dating...Just come to 4 Gigih... My dear B.M. teacher- Pn Asiah... Her part-time job- Teacher in charge of 4 Gigih... Oh my god... Unbelievable... Her work efficiency was very fabulosity... I thought my result will come out on December... But... This morning, my mom tell me that got someone send a letter to my father and initially not feel surprised... Suddenly my mom said the typeface on the envelope is ugly... Ahhhrrr~~~ Impossible(i'm possible)... These is my hand writing... And i opened it as fast as i can(sweating)... Haha!!! Feel dizzy and giddy... Doi~~~ I get 3 substandard... Wu~~~ So "cham"... Lolzzz... How come like this??? Why why ah tell me why... Is that any mistake??? Yes... I did it... Wu~~~ Discover the terrible world of science stream's student life... Feel snubbed... Endlessly... Anyway... It doesn't matter... Just keep diligent... Nothing is impossible...

Last ditch struggle

Repent...Did not spend my time properly...
Hmm...This holiday not my honeymoon...
I arrange my timetable again and again...
I cram my time to study and do "more x10000000......" revision...
Bio, phy, chemist, add math...
Not late...

Avoid my mind think about the silly thing...
In bad mood recently...
Unpleasant affair happen again and again...
But nobody can share with me...
Nobody knows what am i thinking...
I lock myself in the coffer...
Just waiting for somebody to unlock...
I am learning to avoid common mistakes in my life...
Because impossible can become i'm possible...

Nonsense...

Sad Love Story

It had been raining for more than a week, so much rain it made everyday seemed so restless and gloomy. She called and said she was coming up. It was the third time she came up to see me that week. I carried her excuse of why she came all the way here and went to meet her at the nearby seven-eleven. She was standing there alone, carrying her red umbrella. Her friend had dropped her off. It was raining and she was shivering. She looked weak and fragile in the harsh rain, wearing not enough to keep her warm.

I walked up to her and said, "You shouldn't come see me anymore," and stuff like how we shouldn't be together.
She said, "I miss you."
I told her coldly, "Lets go, I'll take you home."
She did not open up her umbrella, I knew she wanted to share mine.
I said, "Open up your umbrella, let's go."

Unwillingly, She opened up her umbrella and walked with me to the car. She said she hadn't eat lunch or dinner and asked if we could stop at some place to eat.

Right away I answered with a stoned heart, "No!"
Disappointed, she asked me to take her to the train station, she said she would take the train back home.

Maybe it was the rain, all the trains were full of people with umbrellas and suit cases who were eager to get home, not caring about who just passed by. We waited and waited, she looked at me innocently. Being together for so long, of course I knew what she meant. I understand how she must feel when she came all this way here in this kind of weather and I treat her like this. With her soft eyes staring at me, I felt guilt and wanted to let her stay for the night.

But reality struck again, I said to her coldly, "Let's go try the other train station."

We were living in the same apartment building, on the same floor. Back then there were four of us, and we got along well. We would always eat dinner together, watch movies, and sometimes go camping. We were more like a family, but I didn't know I would end up falling in love with the only girl of the four. Maybe it was during the last year of college, having living together for two years, we developed deep feelings for each other. After she graduated she went back home, and I stayed for one more year to finish school. During that year I was only able to take the train down to see her on holidays, but never for long. That was how we kept the treasured relationship.

We were walking along the side of the road. She was in front of me and I was right behind her. Her umbrella had a broken spoke. She looked liked a wounded soldier, carrying her rusted rifle walking weakly. Many times, she was too into thinking or whatever she was doing, drifting off the road, she almost got hit by the cars passing by. I wanted to just take her in my arms, but with the love I had for her and the constant pain in my stomach, I did nothing. On the way, we passed by the park where we use to always go.

She begged and said, "Lets go in the park just for a little while please, I promise I'll go home right after this."

With her begging, my cold heart softened, but I still put up an annoyed face and walked in the park. I was just sitting on the benches looking like I wanted to leave. She went to the big oak tree and she was looking for something. I knew she was looking for what we wrote on that tree with a silver ink pen half a year ago. If I remember it right, it said, "Chris and Susan was here, Chris had tea and Susan was drinking hot chocolate. Hope Chris and Susan would always remember this day, always loving each other, forever." She was looking around for quite a while, then she came back slowly with tears on her face.

She said, "Chris, I can't find it, it's not there anymore."
I felt so sour inside, there was a stream of pain, flowing into my heart, the kind of pain I've never felt before. But all I could do was pretend I didn't care, and said, "Can we go now?"
I opened up my big black umbrella, she was just standing there, didn't want to leave yet, hoping there was still a chance. She said, "You made up the story of you and that other girl didn't you? I know I frustrate you sometimes, but I'll change, can't we start over?"

I didn't say a word, just looked down and shook my head. After that we just kept on walking towards the train station, didn't say a word to each other.

Four years ago, the doctor said I had cancer, but it was found early, so it was still curable. Thinking that it was okay, I started living my normal life again, and even forgot about the cancer. I didn't think about the cancer again and did not go back to the doctor. Until a month ago, my stomach was hurting for two weeks straight, and the nightmare awakened me again. First I thought the pain wouldl go away, but it grew stronger until to the point that I couldn't take it anymore. I went back to the doctor and took an X-ray. The picture came out and there was a big black spot, which proved the truth that I did not want to believe. I was at the most glittering part of my life, but it was coming to an end. I wanted myself and the people around me to go through the least pain possible, so I decided to commit suicide. But I couldn't let people find out about my intentions, especially Susan, the person I love the most in this whole world, who still doesn't know about the truth. Susan was still young, she shouldn't have to go through this. So I made up some stories and lied to her. It was a cruel thing to do, and it broke her heart, but it was the fastest way to wipe out three years's feelings. I didn't have much time, because I would soon start to loose hair and she would find out eventually. But now I'm close to succeeding, this drama would soon be over. Thirty minutes more this would all come to an end, that was what I had in mind.

The train had stopped running so I called a taxi for her. We were just standing there, waiting, loosing our last moments in silence.

I saw the taxi from far away, I held my tears and said to her, "Take care of yourself, take good care of yourself."

She didn't talk, just nodded lightly, and then opened up her misshaped umbrella and stepped out on the street. Out in the rain, we became two single life forms, one red, one black, so far away from each other. I opened the door for her and she got in, then I close the gate that would separate me from her forever. I stood by the car, staring in the dark window, at the first love in my life, also the last one, walking out of my life. The car started, driving into the street. Finally I couldn't hold my sorrow and the twist in my heart any longer, waving my arms rapidly chasing after the taxi, because I knew, this would be the last time I see her. I wanted to tell her I still love her, I wanted to tell her to stay, I wanted to tell her so much, but the taxi had already turned in the corner. Warm tears kept falling down my face, blended with the cold rain drops. I was cold, not because of the rain. I was cold inside.

She left, and I didn't get anymore of her phone calls even until today. I know she didn't see my tears, because they were washed away by the rain. I left without regrets. But I'm not Chris, I'm that girl Susan, using my memory, and his diary I found after one year since he left, writing down these last words.

Something wrong...

Erm...
Holiday finally here...
Feel tense...
Have no alternative...
Because of u~~~~
My dear dear result...
Ahhhhrrrr~~~
Sure no A's.....
Pitiless...

Haixxx...
Thus...I must do revision before it is too late...
Revision~~~ Gambateh...
Lolz...It is my turn to take SPM next year...
Hope can gain at least 8A's...
No pain, no gain...
All the best for me...
Let's gambateh...
Grasp the occasion...

Maggie Mee

"Pure" porridge...No!No!No!
Haha!! 9.15p.m...
Having a bowl of MAGGIE MEE~~
The most delicious food in the world...
Seem like a hungry man...
Issshh...Image ruin completely...
I don't care...I don't mind...
Haixx...Holiday nothing to do...
Haven't 16 lo...Nobody want hire me...
Faster 08 ahhrrr~~~Don't afflict me...
Don't leave me alone...
Fill with fright...
Wu~~~

Still remember you...

This afternoon...
I saw you...You smile...
I feel tense...I miss you...
I still remember your face...your smile...
I still remember when i first time saw you...
U r dazzle...
When i'm sad...Can you hug me...
Can't...because you don't like me...
U make me cry...I don't want to cry anymore...
I still remember that day...Morning...10:25a.m...
Why i still remember you...
Even though you hurt me...
Feel distressed...
Even though this is a dream...
Just a dream...
Because in dreamland...


But now...
Just let it pass...
Because i don't want remember you anymore...
If i am a computer...I can throw you into the recycle bin...
Now...I will learn how to forget you...

Stomachache

Very pity...
Last night can't sleep well...
Suddenly...haixx...
My stomach's inside...
Erm...mean my big intestine have something scroll inside...
Sweating...Nausea...Face getting pale...

Till morning...
My mom fetch me to clinic...
Doctor's prologue...haha..
Of course forgot lo...
After...He gives the prescription for nurse...
Then...She gives me candy(colorful pill)...
Sad...Terror...I really hate candy...

Really make me fear is...
Porridge...Nothing inside...
"Pure" porridge...Hoho...
No flavor...Mean tasteless...

Really write down my true words...

不够成熟


我想我还是不够成熟
还达不到 你的要求
我真的没有想的太多
只是怀念 你走以后
nan道真的是解脱
nan道 真的要事过境了以后才懂

倔强说不痛 假装什么伤都没有
倔强抬起头 决不让眼泪往下流
倔强说不痛 假装什么伤都没有
真的不难过 笑着和你挥挥手

如果有一天
我们有缘在见
你会不会想起
说过的永远

I like this song...
Its really make me sad...
Especially first line...
It's an waste to let such talent goes to waste...

"Sunday" boring "Me"

Haixxx... Sunday again...
Normal day...
Sunday=family day...
Mean i have to go out with my family...
Wake up early...
Traffic jam...Feel dizzy...
I prefer to stay at home...
Shopping center...Wasting money again...
Go back home...Tired...
Night...Getting busy( eating after eating also eating)...
Holiday means nothing...

How embarrassing...
How disappointing...
How boring...
This is human being...

0:55 a.m

Can't sleep....
Don't know why....
Was thinking something, someone....


Sometimes i feel regret....
Because not going to tell you about....
My true words....
My own heart....
My happy memory....
My real feelings....


Because of "afraid"
Because of "shy"
Because of "faith"
Because of "you"


Is this fate?
Is this fake?
Is this trap?


I just want your true words...
your real feelings...
But i don't want your swear...

Down down down

Rainy day....
No mood....
No idea....


Feel alone....
Lose direction....
Lose memory....

Nothing is memorable....
Bury the sadness....
Bury the loneliness....